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story 314: Huddy08

hi,
My dad was diognosed with terminal cancer two days after my baby niece was born.
He was only given 4weeks to live. He was a great dad, my best m8. I went to work with him, we went to car racing events and i used to help him on his ice cream van!
He died wen i went away wif the cadets He passed away on 2nd June 07.
I still feel guilty now even though it has been 1yr.
14 days after this my uncle Andy died of cancer also. This was my mams brother. Although me mam and dad split up my mam still love him as a brother.( my mam's mam died of cancer to in 1999)
My uncle peter has just been given 6wks to live too wif cancer. (Asif fings cudn't get worse)!
I have just started to write a book about me dad to try and help me over come my feelings. I often get angry and fustrated at times as i feel it is my fault he died.
My family has given me full support to help me come to terms with my tragic loss.
I some times get flash backs of just seeing him lying there not able to move or speak and it hurts me like hell. To help me come over this i try to think of good things that me and him used to do together but sometimes it doesnt work.
CANCER IS A BIG KILLER.
I dont know what is worse
* A slow and painful death.
*Or a quick death not being able to say goodbye.

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