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poems

I wish

anon

I wish you hadn't
I wish you thought a second longer
About who you were leaving
How much they'd hurt
How much we'd cry
How long it'd take us to mend
What a Dad, friend, brother and uncle shaped hole you filled
My future children will never know their Grandad
You will be a myth to all those that I will want you to meet
I'll walk down the isle alone on my wedding day
Mum will spend her free days of retirement alone
I will only see you in my dreams
I can only hug you in my dreams
I can still smell you in my dreams
And when I wake, it's like you're just downstairs drinking your morning coffee.
But you're not.
I wish you were.

You're suicide note read:
"I thought you made your own luck in life"
Life's tough, and you've made it tougher for me now
It's not unlucky, that's just how it is
If I thought about luck like you did, I would be where you are now
Which is a tempting thought every now and then, but I know the harm suicide causes
I remember the people who love me
I make sure I remember and think about them
All I can do is carry on, make my life, leave luck out of it
I wont be a victim like you were
Parents are there to teach you lessons
The biggest lesson you've taught me is to love my life more than anything
I just wish I didn't have to learn it in such a hard way