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Message from: Catherine, 03 Sept 05

Subject: Someone help me I dont know what to do

Hey. I lost my mum to cancer on 20th march 2005. She had cancer on and off for 10 years, she kept getting over it then it came back again. I was 14 when she died and i was 15 on 22nd august i dont know what to do without her it felt so weird having a birthday without her and i know now iv got every other birthday and christmas to come. She got better so many times when medically she should have died i never believed she actually would de, not til i was grown up at least. To make it worse in november 2004 we moved to northern ireland from england, i dont like it here but it was just bearable with my mum, after my mum died my 18yr old sister left and went back to england, i wanna go back too but my dad wont let me.I'v lost the person i loved most and now im stuck with the person i hate most in another country, all my mums family are in england and i really miss them. Help now im in my gcse year at school and i just dont know what to do without my mum. Please reply x

Subject: Hi Catherine

I'm really sorry to hear about your mum. My mum also died from cancer when I was 16, I'm now 18. It's so hard I know, and I know nothing anyone says ever makes it better.
I just want to encourage you though to try and carry on if you can in Ireland, and maybe think about the possibilty that soon you can go back to England, maybe for university? I know that seems a long way away, but I found that sixth form went very quickly.

I also dread Christmas and birthdays and the Christmas I've had without my mum was very hard. We didn't stay at home and instead went to family, which was slightly easier. I know that you probably don't want to think about it now, but could you maybe spend Christmas in England with some of your mum's family?

I'm so sorry about your mum. I wish no one had to go through this.
lucyxxx

Subject:(no subject)

i lost my mum and i am 14 aswell, i never imagined her not being there, and everyone thinks im coping but im not, your dad is upset at the moment and he might need you as much as you need the rest of your family, try and explain that, he might come with you,

Subject:dont worry

i no how u feel. my bro died he was my bst mate and he died in a car accident. i was in london wit someone i hated but now im where i should be -with my family but it stil dnt make a difference. what do u think ur mum wud want u 2 do. jus follow ur heart.

Subject: sorry

i am so sorry to hear about your mum. i am going through the sort of same thing with the death of my boyfriend. noone knows how you feel but i can only say i am here if u need to talk. Liam died about two and a half months ago now and at first i was angry and then i was upset. At the end of the day u feel how u feel and noone can change that. My advice to you would be to find something that you enjoy doing and do that. i love going to the gym. As time goes by it will get easier but i take comfort in the fact that i know he is looking down on me and helping me through the hard times. Your mum will always be there for you even though u cannot see her, she will be in your heart guiding you through the rest of your life and at least you had the time you did with her.

I am so sorry and nothing i say will make you feel any better. I am thinking of you in this hard time.

lots of love bryony xx

Subject: Hi

I also lost my mum to cancer when i was 10 and i hate christmas now. On christmas day i like to watch vidoes of my mum that we filmed at christmas when she was still alive. I just try to spend christmas with the rest of my family because i now know every minute i spend with t hem is special.