message board

Message from: Natalie, 24 Mar 05

Subject: My Brother and alcohol

A year ago my brother got up one morning, had acup of coffee, took himself out to my dad's garage and hung himself.He had been a confirmed alcoholic for at least 2 years but had actually been bad for years before.We had only just started getting together again after he had been really nasty to my mum.We had just celebrated christmas without him because his drinking was so bad I did not want him round my house or near my young son while he was drunk.Just after christmas was his birthday and a week later he died.He wasn't found for 6 days!My mum blames herself because she had no room for him at her house so he had to go to my dad's,my dad thinks he did it at his house for revenge for leaving us years ago and treating us badly.I'm having a tough time as I feel I have no time to greive,with a young son and a new partner plus work colleagues who think because I'm young I should get over it!I find it creeps up on me when I least expect it.I don't want to talk to my mum as she worries about us (especially that we may do the same thing) and my sister clams up and refuses to talk about him,even the good times.I'm scared the doctor will put me on anti-depressants.I work at a school for children with special needs and know there are people worse off than me in the world (two of my students have died this year) but I hurt too.

Subject:Message 4 u

Hi Natalie, we're so sorry to hear of the recent loss of your brother and just wanted to let you know that there is an organisation that supports people who have lost someone through suicide. They are called SOBS (Survivors Of Bereavement By Suicide) and you can find them at www.uk-sobs.org.uk . It's really hard dealing with a death when someone has chosen to end their own life and it can help a lot to make contact with other people in the same situaution.We do hope you can contact them and get the support you need to see you through this difficult time in your life. Wishing all the best, RD4U.

Subject: (no subject)

I really think you are a brave person to talk about the whole event. i have neva lost an immediate close family and everyday and nite i pray to God that it doesnt happen to me. because i dont think i will be able to handle it as strong as you have. True stories like yours, helps me to realise that i need to be closer to my family and appreciate every moment i spend with them.