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Message from: Ryan, 19 Jan 05

Subject: Flashbacks

I have a lot of flashbacks from wen i found my dad dead
Can any 1 help me

Subject:me 2

dont worrie i do as well but i didnt find mi dad dead but i imagen how he got killed so if u need 2 tlk im here 4 u love nat

Subject:promises

Hey Ryan

Around this time last year I found my mum'd body when I came home from school, and like you I suffer flashbacks. I also have to cope with nightmares as well. I have managed to find some ways that help. Though nothing can make them go away except when you work through your own grief, they will eventually fade. At the moment I only get a few flashbacks a month, instead of a few times a week. I promise you that eventually they won't happen very often. It will get better as time goes on.

I found counseling helped me as I coud talk about what happened and what I found over and over again without someone getting anyoed or upset. If you dont want to se a councelor then talking to anyone will help. (Though I know that often there is no one there to listen.)

Also for me drawing or writing about what i found helped get it out my head and cope with it. Then i would either keep or throw it away, depending on how i felt.

If you get flashbacks at night or have bad dreams then you could keep a torch on while you sleep, or listen to some music until you get back to sleep.

I hope of this helps, just remember that you are doing so well, and one day things will get better, I thought they never would, but finaly they have.
love and hugs, crizzielizzie xXx

Subject:i am the same

ryan, i no exactly what your going thru, both of my parents have died. i found my dad when i was 13 and last year i found my mom, i am 17 but i still have horrible falsh backs and just burst into tears i dont like it as it is so upsetting i am sorry but i am here aswel if you need to tlk as i need someone to talk to aswel xxx