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Message from: lorraine - 18 Mar 04

Subject: dealing with loosing someone close to your heart

I am not really writing this to get messages back from anyone it is more to try and help as many of you as possible. when i was 16 one of my best friends died of heart problems. there was complications after his operation and he didnt make it.at that time he was the only person i knew that had died and it was the worst time of my life. i hated it, i didnt think i could ever be so upset. i miss him loads even now and that was 5 years ago. im am 21 now and now i am having to deal with losing my little sister. she was murdered 18 months ago, she was 18. it has turned mine and my familys lives upside down. it is absolutely devestating. i miss her so much it hurts and at times i am sure i can feel my heart breaking. people then say "how are your parents it must be terrible for them" of course it is, dont get me wrong i am not saying otherwise but sometimes it doesnt occur to them how much us younger ones are hurting too. i have 2 brothers 18 and 15. we have all got to deal with, as i dont have any children i dont understand what it is like to lose one, but because of this brothers and sisters are the closest people to us, possibly more so than our parents are at this point in our lives. as i dont have kids of my own my sister was the closest person to me so it is the worst pain i can feel. i hear noises and i really want it to be her. i am constantly thing about how she died and what she went through wishing there was something i could have done to help but there wasnt. we know the woman that did it was going to do it whatever. she would have got my sister sooner or later. i have read some of you messages and they are very sad indeed.the circumstances make a difference but at the end of te day we are al trying to cope with losing someone we love and trying to get on with having a 'normal' life again. it will never be the same how can it but we dont have to let it ruin our life, the person we are thinking of wouldnt want it to be causing this much pain or anger. what im trying to say is dont give up, dont stop thinking about the person your are missing. use your pain to help your achieve more and do the best you can for yourself. my sister and my friends life were too short. i am now making myself try harder to get the job i want to do, do the things i want to do. as sad as it is we dont know how long weve got so we should do what we want for ourselves if not for our loved ones. i hope you all manage to deal with whtever is going on in your life and dont give up on what you want. try and turn your situation into a kind of positive turing point in your life. good luck all of you xx

Subject: ...

XOXOXOXOX
AMEN SISTER! AMEN!
XOXOXOXOX

Subject: Stay Positive!

Hi Lorraine,
I know you said you didn't post your msg to get replies but I just have to comment.

What a wonderful, positive and inspirational message. I think you should be so proud of yourself!You have come through such difficult experiences and you are able to find positive aspects to it, like taking steps to make your life the best it can be.

I know that it's difficult to reach the point of looking forward after losing someone close and I'm so impressed with your attitude. I just want to say a huge thank you for your message; I know that I will come and read it again if I'm having a particularly hard day and I'm sure I'm not alone.

Stay positive, and know that if you are finding things hard, there will always be someone here to support you.

Take care,
Love
Alexis
xxx

Subject: re:Inspiration!!

I read ur message and i just have to say thank you... ur message meade me see I do have to make something of my life now my dads gone... Your an angel sent from heaven and I thank you for that xx

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