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Message from: rd4u team - 02 Feb 04

Subject: message 224

message 224 has been removed at the request of the person who posted it. we feel it is important to keep the 2 messages that were sent in reply to this message so they still appear below:

Subject: (no subject)

Hiya. im so sorry 2 hear bout ure dad. my dad died bk in march (03) n i miss him so much. it woz the 16th of march. he had a heartattack at home n i saw it - my mum works in cardiology n she tried 2 resusitate him. the ambulance arrived n they tried but it woz no gud - he woz dead. i felt so hopeless all i could do is stand there and watch it all happening - iwasw watchin my dad die n there woz nuthin any1 cud do.
He was only 41 n just the night b4 he was jokin around he n mi mum were sayim=n how they hant got mi bday present yet (it was mi bday on the 21st) that night we were all so happy. n then it was all taken away frm me. mi dad never even had the chance 2 see in mi 13th bday. he told mi he woz gonna take us all out 4 a meal.
I know how u feel n if u eva need 2 tlk then im here 2 listen
Luv Nicky xXx

Subject: L

Hi L,
I'm sorry to hear about your dad. I know that you're feeling so lost right now like life can never be good again. I can hear that you have feelings of guilt about not being there when your dad died, but nobody is to blame.

I can also understand how you feel when you say that if you do try to move on, laugh or smile, that would be like forgetting him but maybe you could try to think about what he would say to that. If you believe in heaven, picture your dad looking over you, I'm pretty sure he will look forward to the day when you feel able to smile when you remember him. I promise you, that time will come.

I have lost my dad too and I have been through many similar thoughts to you; like who will give me away at my wedding; who will wipe my tears away when I feel sad. It's now been nearly a year and a half since I lost my dad and I find it much easier to get up in the morning now.

I feel it's impossible to tell someone the best way to cope but what I will say is, let your friends comfort you, take the offers of support. You will get through this.

I hope this message has been some help to you. If you'd like to message back, I'd be happy to reply.

Take care.
Alexis
xxx

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