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Message from: Tamara, posted 07/08/07

Subject: trying to cope with my mother's death

I lost my mother on the 23rd of June 2007, 1 month and 3 weeks before my 18th birthday. She was in France (with her sister's family) at the time and I hadnt seen her since she left on the 8th of June. Two of the things that I regret the most is not taking to her more often while she was over there, and not booking my flight earlier as i was meant to fly over to her on Sunday (24th). Although she had been battling cancer for many years, the realization that she couldnt get through it this time is very hard to comprehend. The thought that she wont be there to guide me and argue with me through some of the most important times in my life is very painful and i believe it will be for a very long time. At the moment i try not to think about it and put it to the back of my mind but sometimes it gets too much. One thing i can take comfort in though is that she is not in pain anymore and that, with time, i too will stop hurting.
She was 47.