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Message from: Joanne - 4 Mar 02

Subject: My Grandad

I am sixteen years old and I lost my grandad over three years ago now but it feels like it was only yesterday it hurts so much inside I wish it would get better but I am scared that if it does get better maybe I will forget him forever!!!

Subject: my grandad

hello,
I also lost my grandad 4 years ago. I know what you mean about not wanting to forget him, its as though in order to get on with things you would have to forget the pain and to do that you would need to forget him. I don't know but I think there is a way to hold on to the memories, to the happy times but to let the pain go. Its about being able to accept the death and the emotions that surrounded it, its about still loving your grandad but letting him go. It helped me to think about what my Grandad would want if he could still see me, and I know that he would want me to move on, to keep him in my heart, but to be able to dissolve the pain and give more attention to today and my friends and family. Sometimes if you want to move on but you are scared of forgetting him you could try to keep a foto of him in your room, or remember things that he liked to do or to say and keep these memories as special things that help you to continue to feel the love for him so that you don't have to forget him. I hope this helps

Subject: my grandad

hi i know what both of you are going through i lost my grandad not even a yr ago. ever since i have found it very diffulcult to get on with my life. i have lost a HUGE part of me since he went and him not being there at chirstmas and his b'day was even harder. i have tried committing suicide several times i even tried doin it the other day since hes bin gone its been really painful so i no what you are both going through. i was really close to my grandad and lived with him for 3yrs at one point i saw him every week after that. if anyone wants to talk then you can im here for you all as i know how you are all feeling.  everyone says to you "keep your head up high and remeber the good time" but i think how can you its just too painful. ive bin to counselling and they wernt that good ive bin reading some stories and although they are upsetting at least people like us all have a part of the close one to us who died we still have them in our heart.