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Message from: sarah liz , 11 Jul 06

Subject: not coping

my mum died five years ago this october and i am still finding it so hard to cope with. my dad re-married one of her best friends and i hate evrything about her, i hate my father when he's with her. with my mum during her illness he was so tender and gallant, he would carry her to bed in his arms, they're relationship was a storybook love. i got married at 21 (am 22) and think i may have done that in desparation, david is the only person since losing my mum who has made me feel again. but i am so unhappy, and so lost, i don't know how to live without her, i don't know how to be strong.

Subject: Not Coping

Hey,

Just read your message, I've found myself in a similar situation. I am 22 but lost my Dad at the age of 9, at the age of 11 my mum started seeing someone who i detested and to this day they are still seeing each other, as you I hate him and find my mum a different person when she is with him. I'm not sure if you already are but have you tried counselling? I have been going since the age of 16 for the reason above and to this day I have still not accepted the situation and I'm not sure I ever will but I am willing to keep trying as I feel we deserve to be happy just as much as our parents do. Counselling for me has helped me look into things about my life and share horrible experiences with someone who I know is genuinely listening, it is a big help and i intend to carry on till I'm grey and old if it helps! I hope you can find someone to talk to, Hope this helps, take care xx